A Shout-Out for Civility

Good Morning! How are you today? You look very nice today. How can I help you?
You won't find these phrases on tweets, twits, or pagers. For them to be meaningful you need to be in the presence of those to whom you are speaking...(I never thought I would hear myself use the term 'to whom you are speaking'). In order to smile with your face and voice and convey your sincerety of your questions and comments.

If this makes me an old fogey-so be it-but I fear for a society that spends more time concerned with personal entertainment than in any other activity.

We are encapsulated in cars, trains, cubicals or even working from home. We 'talk' to each other through a machine that cannot convey warmth, intent, or inflextion to enhance meaning and emotion. When confronted with a real live human being, we seem to have discarded any intention of being courteous, sensitive, or open to social intercourse--(verbal interaction that allows for intimate conversations).

There are societies, cultures, that do not rely soley or even a little bit on these unnatural means to communicate. They spend several minutes inquiring about your family, your well-being, your opinion before asking what reason moved you to come to their store, or shop. This would make us very uncomfortable, and we would tend to look at their interest with suspicion. Perhaps damaging their efforts at establishing a friendship and hurting their feelings.

It would be good to practice civility if for no other reason, for our children to see that it is a valuable trait and skill that leads to virtues we can role model for each other on a daily basis.

Courtesy, kindness, friendliness, helpfulness, patience, all serve to improve society as a whole. The wise addage- "When you see someone without a smile-give them yours" works for civlity and courtesy too.

One of the keys that have made our marriage work for 34 years--is this-- We always say "Thank you" and acknowledge our partners effort for whatever it is. For every day tasks and chores, dishes, cleaning, cooking, retrieving something from another room...that makes it easier to remember to say it for the big sacrifices as well.

Ok. I'll get off my soapbox--but--it is disconcerting to see the rudeness so wide spread and unchallenged!